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The fact that you’re caring, kind, loyal, warm, and intelligent means that you have a lot going for you and will ultimately make a guy very happy.

So instead of giving up on the whole thing – which, as you know – is incredibly shortsighted, given that you have 50 more years on this earth, how about you change focus?

You should just find a guy who is looking for a Brady Bunch family, who sees sex as the icing on the cake instead of the cake itself.

Maybe your ex shares custody and gives you weekends off, but I think we can all agree that women with four kids have less available time than women without four kids.

Even if I really take my time getting to know someone before we become intimate… Don’t hear from him for days, I assume it’s over…then a text with, “hey are you home tonight? Is it unreasonable that I am hoping someone could take me seriously or see my worth?

I’ve been in a terrible relationship before and honestly now, I’d rather be alone than with the wrong guy.

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Is it too much of an ask that I could actually meet someone who can see me as a woman, and not just as mother or worse, a bit of bedroom fun? I know Everest is high, but SOME people get up the damn thing, don’t they?

Dear Christina, Before I give you the pep talk you need, let me first acknowledge the painful truths that you’ve eloquently outlined above. Having four kids under the age of 9 is a huge handicap.

256 comments

  1. Census data reveal that the interracial marriage rate of black women and mainly white men has only modestly increased from 1% in 1970 to 4.1% in 2000. Research also shows that black women are overwhelmingly excluded as interracial dating partners, with one study showing that white men excluded black women as dating options at 93 percent.

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  3. Chance. Sophie, How is it unfair to suggest that she considers dating men who are in the same boat as her as opposed to men who don’t have kids?

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